saints row review
need to know
what is it? An urban playground with cars made of explosive material but with a less incendiary tone.
Expected payment: $60/£60
release date: August 23, 2022
Developer: will
Publisher: deep silver
Comment on: Windows 10, Ryzen 9 5900X, 32GB RAM, RTX 3080
multiplayer game? Yes
Association: Official website(opens in a new tab)
Saints Row is a driving/shooting/flying ragdoll sim where you lead a misnamed anti-social gang. To be fair, Saints are endearing sociopaths who alternate between organized crime and spirited hijinx, like throwing themselves into traffic for insurance money, along with some minor drug trafficking. That’s probably the only description I can come up with that’s vague enough to describe every game in the series, including this new reboot, and not just say it’s Grand Theft Auto, just the jokes are funny.
Until now, every Saints Row sequel has been more flamboyant than the one before it, eventually finding new tops and then surpassing them in some way. Saints Row 2 features a villain with voodoo powers, and your partner can take on an entire police force alone. Saints Row: The Third pits you against wrestlers, cyberpunks, and zombies, Saints Row 4 gets better with an alien invasion, and its spin-off, Gat Out of Hell, has Satan as the ultimate boss.
(Image credit: Deep Silver)
When SR2 fans say they miss how solid it is, they mean they’re okay with a game featuring motorcycle katana duels, but SR3 crossed the line by including a Japanese game show about straight-up murder. Personally, I love the series’ escalating quirkiness, but it doesn’t leave itself much to be desired. I guess that’s why instead of creating a new Saints Row to do time travel or branch off on an alien planet or something like that, Volition hit the restart button.
Saints Row from the ground floor might please those who missed the “courage” of Saints Row 2, but if the internet was passable, they already hated it. The reboot comes with new actors they despised from the first trailer. On the Internet I have seen these saints called zoomers and Millennials, and hipsters, it’s an impressive series of nonsense descriptions that amount to “young people I don’t know.”
One of the new saints gave up an unpaid internship to become a crime boss mechanic, one was a start-up entrepreneur who overdosed on TED Talks and podcasts, and the other was a man allergic to shirts DJ. At the same time, you work for a private security company whose one-time employees usually fail the training. All of these characters mimic modern archetypes, as the energy drink mogul, post-hippie Stoner, and auto-tuned pimp of old games did when relevant. While I don’t care as much about the new crew as the villains who grew up as tight-knit families over the course of the original game, there aren’t many sequels to develop for these characters. they are very good.
We meet these rebooted Saints in the intro at the peak of their management of the city, and then spend the next 25 hours reviewing how they got there. That means after fully customizing your boss to look like an older Batman villain or a pantomime turned criminal, suddenly you’re a regular schmo with a day job in law enforcement, and your The roommates are young and they know and care who Doja Cat is. I ended up swapping out my elaborate character for the first preset an hour later because I felt like an actor. It’s a shame because it’s a great character creator in a series they’re known for.
(Image credit: Deep Silver)
Even if you stick with the default face, the clothing options allow you to like layering, mixing and matching shirts by keeping jackets and socks separate from shoes. This is something Saints Row has not done since combining clothing with physics. The tradeoff is that coats and skirts are noticeably stiff, and most hairstyles are static for reasons that became apparent when I tried a ponytail, which went right across my face. Still, whether you want your boss to be a leather-jacketed jerk, a bright-green fool, or a burrito-dresser, Saints Row has it all.
Saints Row was a good time when I was wearing a luchador mask and murdering EDM-themed criminals with spinning glow stick shields. You can shoot prone on a moving car and unlock the ability to let you fire a gun or stuff a grenade into someone’s pants and throw it at a crowd. Demolition animations include bloody knife and pistol work, as well as human torpedoes and karate kid crane kicks.
(Image credit: Deep Silver)
The options for changing the way the game is played are welcome and plentiful, and there should be a menu to show other games when they’re sitting in the corner thinking about what they’ve done. The GPS arrows that illuminate the streets can be turned off or adjusted so they only stick out of corners, the minimap can be resized, the enemy’s health can be changed if you find them too loose or weak, the ammo scarcity can be changed, and the nudity or cover can be toggled Censorship columns with all kinds of humor, time limits extended or closed altogether, etc.
After a bug made the countdown disappear and I failed because I didn’t realize the clock had started, I’d love to set the task timer to be more forgiving. In the end, aside from the agility of the onboard camera, I didn’t actually mess with the settings. I just appreciate that they are there, that’s how I feel about the plug-in two-person mode, and I’ll never bother because it leaves me alone.
(Image credit: Deep Silver)
It also works fine on PC, which is not a given. To get decent framerates out of Saints Row: The Third Remastered, I had to turn off Windows 10’s Data Execution Prevention, and the original SR3 was just as quirky when running on modern hardware. Meanwhile, the restarts stayed above 60 fps and looked better than the early trailer suggested. Some of the corners cut to achieve that frame rate are obvious, like making your cat look like it’s shaggy from another game, odd shadows or jagged clothing occasionally, and mid-range The cars transition to the ethereal plane when they see you coming.
The city is not particularly prosperous either. Santo Ileso is a desert town somewhere in the American Southwest that doesn’t have that crowded center, and it’s fun humming in a stolen helicopter as you zip through a forest of skyscrapers. It’s so flat that I forget I even have a wingsuit when I’m not doing the side hustle where you have to use it.
(Image credit: Deep Silver)
Holy no one has time
A hallmark of Saints Row games is how they connect to these open-world activities. When you do some side quests, you never feel like a different character from the main plot because you’re like a lunatic in the cutscenes. You have to do some side hustle to unlock new quests, and this push and pull usually means at least a long chore because you eat too much meat before you eat your veggies.
It’s more serious than usual because the job you need to do, called crime risk, is the worst job they’ve ever done. It’s really tedious to have to drive a truck full of toxic waste to a dump without overflowing, and the return of insurance fraud (the one where you encounter traffic) isn’t as fun as it used to be. Ragdoll aftertouch has been toned down, making it harder to drop into multiple cars for combos when you’re tumbling down the highway like a death-wish fish.
(Image credit: Deep Silver)
The best new adventures are testing experimental prototypes you can keep, including a hoverboard and sticky rocket bombs called thrust destroyers that propel targets into the sky as if they were abducted by aliens. Beyond that, I found myself sticking to vanilla side quests like stealing food trucks because the others were so mediocre. Unlocking these criminal activities also costs increasing amounts of cash, and spending $400,000 or more on an item that turns out to be useless is a real challenge. (Honestly, put off toxic dumps as long as possible.)
Compared to spraying sewage on luxury homes to reduce property values, or getting bitten by a tiger in the passenger seat while driving, the restart seems grounded. One of them is actually just taking pictures. Again, with the exception of the Thrust Breaker and Foam Glove Pistol, most of the weapons are real guns, and while you can throw anti-gravity grenades or summon alternate saints out of thin air, you can only put four on the ability wheel once. (Half the time the Reserve Saints do nothing when they get hit.)
Saints Row is always at its best when it’s relaxed, and when it’s downright stupid, reboots forget about that for a long time. When it remembers, you get a storyline where you take part in city-wide LARPs, wear cardboard armor, and fight Mad Max cosplayers with foam weapons, which is how much more stupid it can do.
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Burger chain Freckle Bitches has changed its name to FB. The internet thinks it’s the end of the world. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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Unlockable themes make your crew even more unique. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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Kev is allergic to cats and also wears a shirt. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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The crib becomes even more luxurious when you play. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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Various review columns for connoisseurs. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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It’s nice to have the boat explode. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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OK Millennials (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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References to the original game appear in the weapon decals. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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Manny? Sorry. Manny? (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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Turret section, check. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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What did Daft Punk do after it disbanded? crime. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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I want this jacket in real life. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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Who would have thought that this young man had so much blood on his body? (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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You can’t pet cats. (Image credit: Deep Silver)
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